From the Trenches

It's all well and good for us to provide you with advice about things like cancer prevention, stress management, and caring for a loved one who's been diagnosed with cancer. Based on our experience with patients in the clinic and the information we gather from other sources, we feel comfortable acting as a kind of authority on these subjects. But sometimes the best advice comes from the people who have actually been through this fight - survivors.

CureToday.com recently asked this question on Facebook...

"If you could go back and give yourself one piece of advice on the day you were diagnosed with cancer, what would it be?"

Some of the responses were very poignant and moving, others more practical. Some, like the ones that encourage lots of research vs. the ones that discourage looking at statistics, are even contradictory. We've chosen some to share and would love to know...what would your advice be?

"research, research, research"

"Try to remain as positive as possible."

"Don't make any decisions in haste. Take the time to process the choices and the outcomes."

"let people help"

"Costume wigs are cheaper and more fun."

"Take better notes. Never go to an appointment alone... Let people help you."

"Get the prescriptions for anti-nausea meds and take them before you need them."

"Remember to breathe."

"Tell people your situation."

"Take a family member/friend with you so you don't have to hear the news alone."

"Believe that God will get me through this ... Always get a second treatment opinion... Don't read statistics!"

"Stay calm, it's NOT a death sentence! :)"

"To remember that, in some ways, the diagnosis is a gift, even if it doesn't feel like one: I know how precious life is."

"Keep a journal. Jot down all subsequent doctor's visits, tests, etc."

"Educate yourself, ask questions, have your voice heard."

"Be comfortable with your choice of oncologist. If the doctor doesn't feel like a fit for you, find someone else BEFORE you start any chemotherapy and/or radiation."

"Don't let panic set in."

"Don't worry about things you cannot change. Be happy for each day no matter how mundane it may be."

"My husband would give himself the same piece of advice he has lived with since being diagnosed with brain cancer five years ago. Never let it win!!"

"Don't believe anyone who says a needle biopsy of any kind is just 'a little prick.'"

"Become selfish! No second chance." 

Kids need information too.

 Many of us grew up in households where children were not involved in discussions involving money, politics or illness. Today, children are much more involved in the plans and activities of their households, but one thing has remained fairly constant. It's still difficult to know what or how much to tell children if one of their close family members, especially a parent, is ill.

There seems to be a general idea that children don't "need" to know things that might be scary or uncertain. We often err on the side of caution when we don't want to upset children with bad news. But what if, in the attempt to save them from being worried or afraid, we are only putting off an inevitable conversation that may not be any easier later? It doesn't take long for a child to figure out something is wrong when someone they love is spending a lot of time in bed and suffering the effects of chemotherapy and/or radiation. Keeping a child uninformed may work temporarily, but it can create a lot of added stress in the home.

At Hope Cancer Resources we have materials available that can help parents talk to their children about their cancer diagnosis. They offer potential questions children may ask and provide words that can be used to let children know what to expect throughout treatment and recovery. The bottom line is that it's okay for a child to be fearful, and to ask questions. It should be okay for them to be angry as well... just as their parents may be. It's how those emotions are handled that is important.

If parents are afraid to have these discussions alone our social workers can help facilitate those potentially emotional conversations. There is strength in knowledge, and children can be a parent's greatest source of encouragement and hope. Even if the prognosis isn't good, honesty can create an environment that is uplifting and healing for everyone involved.

In addition to the one-on-one support and printed materials we have available, we also sponsor a support group that meets for six weeks at a time called Children's Lives Include Moments of Bravery (CLIMB). It meets a couple of times a year when there are enough interested families signed up. At the sessions, children meet as a group with a social worker. They are allowed to speak freely about their fears and ask as many questions as they like - or just sit quietly and listen if that's their preference. At the same time, parents are in a separate room learning how to help their children deal with the new priorities that may be taking over the family schedule. They are also given suggestions about dealing with their own emotions while remaining open to their childrens' questions. It's a time for everyone involved to become empowered and learn some techniques for stress management.

The next CLIMB session is being planned now for March-April. If you are interested in getting on the list, contact one of our social workers at 479-361-5847. In the meantime, we'll be happy to provide those materials mentioned above... feel free to ask.

Oncology Social Workers - healing and giving HOPE

Most of us would assume that the words "You have Cancer." delivered by a medical professional would make us afraid for our health. Physical limitations might follow, which would be fairly easy to predict. Fear of death is a given, and we would probably think of our family, and the burden that we might become on them while we are ill.

But even though you expect the physical and emotional results of the diagnosis, you may not know the stress that dealing with a diagnosis and the resulting treatment brings, can have a very real impact on the ability a patient has to heal, recover, and survive. In fact, patients who receive phycho-social support in the form of counseling and support group activities have a higher rate of survival than those who do not. For that reason, cancer centers all over the U.S. are starting to add a social work component to their treatment plans.

HOPE, Inc. employs three licensed social workers in order to provide assistance to cancer patients in northwest Arkansas. Starting with the initial visit a patient makes to Highland's Oncology Clinic in Fayetteville, a social worker is assigned to assess their needs for financial and emotional assistance, and to keep in touch with that patient to continue access to our services as they make the frightening and sometimes confusing journey through cancer treatment.

Even if a cancer patient is not being treated at the Fayetteville Highland's, they can still receive emotional and financial support from HOPE if they live in Washington, Benton, Carroll or Madison counties. For more information on our services please contact us at 479-571-4673 or visit our website at http://www.hopenwa.org/.

A Change of Seasons

It seems that for many people a change of seasons gives pause; makes us think critically about the past few months and look hopefully to the future. We look around us and make plans to change things that haven't been working for us. We find ways to improve our circumstances... whether it be our employment situation, or just the way our laundry room is organized. It's a change - a chance to shed one situation and start fresh. Funny how this happens just due to a change in temperature, isn't it?

This cultural phenomena is mirrored in the way that we react to the news of having cancer. All of a sudden, what was stressful or challenging before is no longer looming as large. Or perhaps those situations are still affecting our lives, but we see them through a different filter. The filter called Cancer changes our perspective in many ways, large and small.

At HOPE, we meet with people every day who have just started seeing through that filter. They still have challenges - and they may be facing new ones - but with our help they find resources and meet people who have been where they are and can help anticipate some of the things that are on their horizon as they go through their treatments.

One of the things we have had on our plate over the last few months was our 5th Annual Bill Fleeman Gentlemen of Distinction Fashion Show. It was held October 10 in Rogers, and we were all thrilled to see the evening arrive and the attendees enjoying themselves. We had almost 450 there that evening, and $65,000.00 was raised to benefit HOPE throughout the next year. Big thanks goes out to our presenting sponsors, Harps and Price Cutter, and all the models who risked their reputation to strut down the runway for us:

Blake Evans, Scott Crossett, Derek Gibson, Art Morris, Patrick Woodruff, Chris Haimbach, Tony Hui, Gerald Jordan, J. Max Van Hoose, Roger Gildehaus, Scott Hancock, and James Keenan were all fantastic!

Thanks too, to Sidney P. Davis, Jr., the recipient of our Bill Fleeman Gentleman of Distinction award that evening. Sid and his lovely wife, Rita, have been supporters of HOPE for many years, and recently donated to the new cancer care facility being built at UAMS in Little Rock. They are wonderful supporters of our mission, and that of cancer care throughout the state.

We hope you are looking forward to a lovely holiday season with your friends and family. Please remember us as you consider your gifts this year - a donation to HOPE provides assistance to those in our community who may be finding it hard to enjoy the holidays. We appreciate your support.

Who needs HOPE?

Studies have been done that measure the relationship between a person's attitude or level of optimism and their success in life. Over and over again they show that the more optimistic a person is, the more often they will find the silver lining in the thunderclouds that are filling their skies.

You can imagine, then, what an attitude of hopeful optimism can do for the many people in our community who are living with cancer. For too many, cancer is not only a serious illness to be fought through and survived, but the diagnosis also carries the very real threat of losing one's job due to the patient's inability to work during their treatments. That job loss can too quickly lead to a fear of losing their home, their car, custody of their children... Suddenly, being sick is almost the least of their worries. The immediate needs take up more of a patient's mental and physical energy and recovery becomes harder to focus on.

HOPE, Inc. was founded in 2001 by physicians and former cancer patients here in Northwest Arkansas. They saw a need for a source of information and assistance that can available to cancer patients while they are undergoing treatment. We work with oncology patients in Benton, Washington, Madison and Carroll counties to provide emotional support, emergency financial assistance, and referrals to other cancer support organizations when it is appropriate.

We also offer access to clinical trials that have not been available to many patients in Northwest Arkansas before now. Our staff includes a Registered Nurse who manages the paperwork and research involved with patients' applications and physicians' administration of the trials, thereby providing peace-of-mind and a reduction of frustration for those who need it most.

We have created this blog to allow us to provide up-to-date information and an online presence in order to reach as many people as possible with the message of HOPE. Come back often, refer your friends, and support us as you feel you can. We are all neighbors, and we can all use a little HOPE.